- I am having a family emergency, my grandma is not doing too well...this is the first time someone I consider myself to be very close with is close to being lost...I've never done this before, how does this go?? I am okay until I have to openly deal with it by talking out loud about it, so I have no idea what it will be like when I see her...I'm scared, I don't want to go, but I do...I almost feel like I'm in denial because I just am not completely accepting of the fact that she isn't doing too well. I just wrote her a letter last week, talking about Thanksgiving coming up, Mary [my cousin] and the baby and just seeing her for the holidays. I mean this is all happening so fast! I'm not ready for her to leave, I just started getting really close with her over the past few years since I've been away from VA this just doesn't seem fair.
- I had to take off the next couple days to go to VA, my whole family is already there, I wasn't going to go until Sat, but something tells me to just go now. So I'll be on my way in about 6 hours. My brother has already flown in from England, I'm basically the only one left to get there. In my letter I was telling my grandma to just hold on, because I would be there soon...I guess sooner than I thought.
- I am really missing VIBE right now, thankfully though, Aileen has offered to let me 'shadow' her so that I can still be there to help out, I am just as of now an unofficial intern. Today I went back for the first time, everyone was surprised to see me, it was nice helping everyone out again. Just like Sept...damn I miss it. Spring is right around the corner though, so I will be back before I know it. My name is on this month's issue for interns though, so that's cool. [Keyshia Cole cover]
- I've thought a lot about my love life, and realized that no one is going to want to settle down since I can't even stay in one place [this is my excuse at least for now]. I mean if I plan to go home to VA for winter vacation, then Mexico for January, then back to NYC for spring, VA and London for summer, then Rome for the fall...I mean I'm like a nomad...so I've come to the conclusion that I just should relax and go with the flow of things [well it's what I should have been doing this whole time, but now I've just had a little epiphany] so anyways I'm more accepting of my failure with relationships...that's all.
- I miss friends, I feel like the older we get, the farther we grow apart....is that the result of bad connections and keeping in touch, or is this how it is supposed to be? Oh well, all the more reason to concentrate on the prize...
- My math teacher is officially a douche-bag. I didn't realize my parents were paying money for me to go to school and not get help when I ask. Tell me if this makes sense and if I am over reacting...I sit in the front row of my Tuesday night class. I never have fallen asleep, I actively participate, I answer most of the questions anyways by volunteering. So the one time I don't understand something, and ask for help [when no one else in the class does because they just don't care] and then I still continue to not understand...he gets mad and frustrated. Saying the same things over and over which I originally never understood in the first place is not going to help me understand either....PLUS when another student and myself stay after to try to continue on trying to figure out the same stuff we've been struggling with the entire class, he has the nerve to rush and leave. The class is technically still in session for another 40 minutes. Don't tell me to think about it some more and maybe I will figure it out by next class....because if I couldn't understand it when you tried to help me, I'm not going to be able to figure it out on my own...smart-one. I swear...idiots.
- It's that time of the month, so I'm extra moody, extra pimply and emotional. great. love it.
Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me; You will stretch forth Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, And Your right hand will save me.
-Psalm 138:7
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